The notorious housewife

Yashoda never trusted her husband.

He was wayward and never cared for her. So she pinched a 500 or a 1000 Rupee note from him every week over the past five years, and dreamt of buying beautiful clothes, purses and what not.

Her husband never bothered to check the odd Rs.1000 or Rs.500 that went missing. He secretly knew that his wife was pinching it too, but did not bother because it gave him the licence to have his secrets too.

Until one day, the Supreme Leader announced his magic bullet.

Unable to come to terms now that her ploy is out in the open, she was drinking kadak chai and contemplating what to do.

The unbearably one morning, some five days after the grand announcement, she came and handed over her secret stash to her husband.

“Darling, there is just a few lakhs in this. Please somehow convert it and get me some nice clothes.”

The husband had tears of joy. “Wow, how the supreme leader has empowered husbands.”



The samosa seller

I know a samosa shop near my erstwhile office. The vendor sells many samosas a day. I have wondered if he would make a few thousands of rupees every day. It is easily possible. He is a very hard-working man, who must work at least 12 hours a day, to earn what he does.

I am certain he will deal only with currency notes.

But no matter how much he earns selling samosas, unfortunately the scale of his enterprise is only that. By the lack of his own vision and the fear of the risks of scaling up, stuck forever being a samosa vendor.

He is not going to take a sabbatical, change career mid-way, he does not have Facebook or friends to guide him. He earns a lot but his quality of life is just that. He sits and stares at a big vessel with boiling oil every day.

I don’t even care if this man has stacks of 500s or 1000s lying around his home. At best, he probably could buy a house in some suburban locality.

I don’t have a problem if he evades taxes to earn a couple of lakhs on the side.

This man is actually small fry, and besides he makes great samosas.

I wanted the bigger crooks to be held to account. The power hungry politicians, the Corporate giant who feeds them money and power, the playboy millionaire who is sipping vodka in an UK mansion … bring them to account first.

Let the politicians clean their own act up first. Let BJP come ahead and announce it will stop receiving cash as party funds. Let them PayTm it. Let every one within BJP first open up their bank accounts, make all their transactions public.

Looks like Modi and Jaitley, like Trump, have started targeting the poorest first.

All deposits above Rs. 2.5 lakhs are being monitored by the Income Dept.

So are the Income Tax guys going to go to this samosa shop to go figure how many samosas he could possibly sell and how many clients could he possibly have?

Because looking at numbers won’t tell you shit about India.

Go eat a samosa, guys. Stop wondering who this scheme is going to hurt the most. I have absolutely no doubt where the pain is going to be most acute.

So stop telling me about the gains for now. Let us talk that a year later.

Addendum: *This is a story to highlight some things. I pay taxes. I am against corruption. I sometimes think about society, which I promise to stop soon.*